Let it Fade

There you are in elementary school. Sitting with your class and the teacher asks that life altering question, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”

Do you remember your answer?

I wanted to be an FBI agent. I couldn’t tell you why I chose that profession. Maybe it was because I was a faithful viewer of The Hardy Boys / Nancy Drew series and I loved mystery and intrigue. Why the FBI though? I haven’t a clue.

New question.

“What is God’s calling on your life?” 

If you are like me, you probably stumbled all over that answer too. I mean, sure I have ideas and dreams about what I would like to be in the kingdom, but is that what God has called me to be?  Some days I would say absolutely and other days I would say I really don’t know. So often I feel unworthy of the call.

Have you been walking on a surface that’s uncertain?
Have you helped yourself to everything that’s empty?
You can’t live this way too long.
There’s more than this, more than this.

Have you been standing on your own feet too long?
Have you been looking for a place where you belong?
You can rest, you will find rest.
You can rest, you will find rest.

Let this old life crumble, let it fade.
Let this new life offer be your saving grace.
Let this old life crumble, let it fade, let it fade.

Have you been holding on to what this world has offered?
Have you been giving in to all these masquerades?
It will be gone, forever gone.
It will be gone, it will be gone

Let this old life crumble, let it fade.
Let this new life offer be your saving grace.
Let this old life crumble, let it fade, let it fade.

Let it fade.

Are you carrying the weight too much? Are you running from the call?
Let it fade, Oh yeah.

You can rest, you will find rest.
You can rest you will find rest.

Let this old life crumble, let it fade.
Let this new life offered be your saving grace.
Let this old life crumble, let it fade, let it fade.

Let this old life crumble, let it fade.
Have you been standing on your own feet too long?
Have you been looking for a place where you belong?

~ Jeremy Camp, Let it Fade

I remember the first time I heard this song. I was at that place during the journey where I began to doubt that my salvation was even real. I had experienced God’s miraculous healing in a fight with cancer, had shared my testimony, prayed for others, taught others, and yet; I wasn’t sure if I died today if I would enter the kingdom, much less have a calling of God on my life.

Why did I feel that way?

Simply put, I forgot to allow God to be the one in control of my life. I knew the right things to do, and I did them religiously. And that is the key. Often times we take the relationship out of our Christianity and make it just another daily routine. It becomes a necessary habit such as brushing our teeth, eating, or sleeping, and we forget that this is a relationship not a habit-ship.

I allowed my walk to become routine and forgot to really seek God first.  And if I was not seeking God first, what was I seeking after?

Short answer is my own selfish desires. I wanted to do things my way, in my time… and that led to my confusion and doubt.

You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

~Ephesians 4:22-24, NIV

So let me ask you again. What is God’s calling on your life? 

Recently my daughter and husband were sitting together on the couch and began teasing me about something. When I looked up I was taken aback by how much she looked like him. Why would that astound me? Because while Rich is a wonderful father to my daughter, he is not her biological father and they cannot possibly look alike. But looking like someone is more than just physical attributes, it’s all encompassing.  She looked like him because she spent time with him and was learning his mannerisms, his speech patterns, and his ability to love. Learning all his attributes and taking them on her, made her look like him.

Our call? To look more like Jesus.  

How do we do that?  We spend time with Him in relationship and not habit-ship and we “Let this old life crumble, let it fade. Let this new life offered be your saving grace. Let this old life crumble, let it fade, let it fade.”

More From Dawn

• Love Is... not about you
• All I Want for Christmas
• Voices...
• Stories...We All Got 'Em
• More Beautiful You