I was nineteen years old, a freshman away at college, and having the experience of a lifetime when I discovered that I was carrying with me the most precious and delicate package I could image.? I was pregnant.? While I was familiar with unplanned pregnancies, since many of my friends had faced this challenge, I had learned from my friends mistakes.? I knew that this could happen and how devastating it would be, that is why I was particularly careful.? I was a responsible, young lady and this was not supposed to happen. This was not my plan and it all seemed so much bigger than my self and what I could handle.? I never really knew what hit me.
I immediately became a new person.? My innocence was gone and I would never look at life the same.? There was this overwhelming sense of “knowing” in my life now.? I knew things about what I needed to do that I didn’t want to know.? It was rather unsettling for the next nine months because there seemed to be this force driving me to make decisions about things that I couldn’t even absorb.? How was I supposed to take all of this in, process it and then create a conscience solution? ? I know this force was God because making these choices at nineteen was truly beyond my self.? I tried with all I had to not think about my circumstances and just be who I once was.? I wanted my life to be so different but I kept having these realizations that I really didn’t have a choice and I was either going to be honest with myself or I was going to continue adding more difficulty into my life.? For six months I made very tentative plans to keep my baby.? This baby was my blood and I would keep him and raise him.? If nothing else he would have me and I would have him.? I hoped that my mother’s instinct would kick in when he was born and I would miraculously be able to provide all of his needs.? While the plans were completely unreasonable, they were my attempt to grasp a hold of my life and make choices for myself.? These plans were one of my many efforts to deny what I knew in my heart was the inevitable.? I couldn’t bear to face the fact that I could not be a mother to my baby.? All the love in the world was not going to make us a house and money to pay the bills.? Love would not provide emotional support, a college degree or a great job that allowed me to spend time with my child.? More importantly than anything else, his father was completely out of the equation.? I did not have what he needed and there was a bigger purpose happening in my life that I had to be true to.
Once I surrendered to this overwhelming message that had been with me all along, I knew I would give my baby up for adoption.? Contrary to what I thought would happen, I had such peace in this path.? I had zero support from anyone to even carry this child to term but this force from God inside me overpowered any distraction that stood in the way of this path I was now on.? From that moment forward I knew what I was doing.? Every choice and decision was made on my own and I never looked back once.? I met many adoptive parents and it was the last couple I met that I chose.? Not a doubt entered into my mind about them.? I will never forget the look in their eyes.? It was the same as every other couple.? Their eyes told how eager they were to love a child.? Their eyes yearned to pour love, opportunity and a bright future into my baby.? This is when I realized that this was the bigger purpose here.? This was not about me at all.? I had a responsibility to do right by my child and though it hurt, it felt right.? When my son was born, there was pain that will never end that came with that surrender but there has always been a peace.? I was given a new strength in that peace and it still sustains me today.
Now that I have been blessed with another son, Sam, I am constantly reassured that I was not equipped at 19 to raise a child.? Seeing the extent of Sam’s needs brings such clarity to my “knowing” that I could not be a mother to my first son.? All children are a gift to us from God and deserve nothing short of parents who are eager to nurture the blessings that every child brings to this world.? When I was expecting Sam I was ready.? I was as ready as any parent can be.? I was devoted really.? Devoted to nourish this child and provide for him so he can achieve his purpose in this life.? My first physical investment (aside from the many most important prayers for Sam to grow to know God and live in his ways) was making the decision to store his umbilical cord blood at birth.? This is called cord blood banking (CBB) and it is a once in a lifetime opportunity to provide a child with the most advanced health care possible and it is specific just to that child.?
Umbilical cord blood contains stems cell that have the unique ability to adapt into other cells and stimulate new, healthy growth among specific cells throughout the body.? To date, cord blood is used to treat over 40 diseases including cancers, genetic diseases, immune system deficiencies and blood disorders.? Technology and research? have advanced cord blood into? an extraordinary? power and it continues to flourish.? ? This is can be even more important for an adopted child because they will most likely never have even the slim chance of a genetically matched sibling.?
I have become an advocate for umbilical cord blood banking because? I feel it is? essential for every parent to, at least,? be aware? of this potential.? I do research on a regular basis to determine the best cord blood banking company to make this investment with.? It is very important that you place this gift into the most secure and capable hands.? I do see this as a gift to provide for your child and strongly encourage every parent to make plans to store your child’s umbilical cord blood.? As a birth parent I see this as the most beautiful gift to supply for an adopted child to make their family most complete.? I only wish I had known of this potential ten years ago when I gave my son up for adoption.? ?
In being a parent, love is all the same. Love is Love is Love.? My favorite quote by Elizabeth Stone, “Making the decision to have a child is momentous.? It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.”? This says it all.? We all make the choice to have a child or not and it is then the choices we make for their best interest that we are accountable for.? We all will make sacrifices and we will do anything to protect the well-being of our child.? While you are holding the most precious package you may ever receive you will have no regrets and only be thankful that you chose umbilical cord blood banking for your child. ?
Erinn Foster
To learn more about Erinn’s choice and receive an exclusive savings on umbilical cord blood banking at visit www.BankForYourBaby.com.
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WOW! Thank you Erinn for this amazing article! I to was surprised with a pregnancy at a young age (18) but I was fortunate enough to have a supportive boyfriend (now husband) and family. I know I never could have done it otherwise! It is amazing how you have taken this difficult time in your life and turned it into such a wonderful message that I think every mother out there needs to read!
Crystal Unrau
Erinn,
Thank you. I had a son at age 17 and my boyfriend at the time was abusive, unfaithful and in other ways unsavory. I was simply too low to leave. After landing in the hospital, I decided adoption was the only way to go.
Jake (his new nickname for a John Jr.) is turning 11 in 10 days and while a day doesn’t go by that I don’t think of him, I know he is so much better off. I look forward every year to the photos of a boy who looks much like me and my children now. My husband lets me be alone and cry for a while and I come out again remembering that I was not ready to be a Mom and was not a good one during the few months that I had my son. I gave joy to a family that needed a child to love and am the better for it.
Sometimes I feel so alone in this, so reading the story of another in a similar situation truly helps me. Thank you for being so brave!
Holly Pia
http://www.athome.com/hollypia